INFJs are known for their calm and collected demeanor, often avoiding conflict and striving for harmony in their relationships.
However, just because they may not show it on the surface, doesn’t mean that INFJs don’t experience anger.
In fact, when pushed too far, INFJs can become smoldering supernovas, unleashing their pent-up frustration in unexpected ways.
So what exactly makes an INFJ angry?
Let’s dive into the core values and triggers that can set off this personality type, and explore how they choose to deal with their emotions.
What Makes An INFJ Angry
INFJs have a strong sense of empathy and value social harmony, which means that anything that disrupts this harmony can make them angry. This includes people who disrespect other people’s beliefs, opinions, and values, as well as bullying, discrimination, and close-mindedness.
Physically and verbally abusive behavior, aggression, and intentional distractions are also triggers for INFJs. They will become angry if someone hurts their friends or loved ones, or if they feel like they are not making progress towards a goal.
Despite their anger, INFJs often choose to repress their emotions in order to maintain peace and avoid conflict. They may spend a lot of time reflecting on the situation alone and deciding whether it is worth addressing or forgetting.
INFJs may also release their anger through creative hobbies or exercise, rather than confronting the source of their frustration directly. This is because they hate conflict and the idea of confronting someone might break them out in hives.
The Core Values Of An INFJ
INFJs have a set of core values that guide their actions and decisions. These values include compassion, empathy, and a strong desire for social harmony. INFJs believe in treating others with respect and kindness, regardless of their background or beliefs. They are passionate about helping those in need and standing up for the underdogs.
One of the most important values for an INFJ is authenticity. They value honesty and integrity in themselves and others, and they have a deep aversion to anything that feels fake or insincere. This includes people who pretend to be something they’re not, or who hide their true feelings or intentions.
Another core value for INFJs is personal growth and self-improvement. They are always striving to better themselves and learn new things, and they value this same drive in others. INFJs believe in the power of self-reflection and introspection, and they are always seeking ways to improve themselves and their relationships with others.
Finally, INFJs value creativity and imagination. They have a deep appreciation for art, music, literature, and other forms of creative expression. They believe that creativity is essential for personal growth and fulfillment, and they often use creative outlets as a way to process their emotions and release their anger in a healthy way.
Betrayal And Injustice: INFJ Triggers
One of the biggest triggers for INFJs is witnessing betrayal and injustice. As natural problem solvers, strategists, and advisers, INFJs feel a strong sense of responsibility to help others find peace and harmony. When they witness someone they care about being treated unfairly or experiencing injustice, they can become extremely angry and stressed.
INFJs tend to repress their anger and avoid conflict, but when it comes to betrayal and injustice, they may feel compelled to speak up and defend their loved ones. They may become angry at those who have hurt their friends or family members, or at those who have taken advantage of someone’s vulnerability.
In addition, INFJs are highly sensitive to violations of their core values. If someone they trusted betrays them or goes against their beliefs and values, they may feel deeply hurt and angry. This can lead to a sense of disillusionment and loss of trust in others.
How INFJs Deal With Anger: Coping Mechanisms
When an INFJ experiences anger, they may cope with it in a variety of ways. One common coping mechanism is to withdraw and become more introspective. They may seek out a quiet space where they can process their thoughts and emotions without being overwhelmed by the feelings of others.
Some INFJs may also choose to suppress their anger entirely, avoiding conflict and choosing to release their emotions through creative outlets or physical exercise. This can be a healthy way for INFJs to deal with their anger, as it allows them to release pent-up emotions without causing harm to themselves or others.
In some cases, however, an INFJ’s anger may reach a breaking point, leading to what is often referred to as “INFJ rage.” This is when an INFJ’s pent-up anger is unleashed all at once, often taking those around them by surprise. When this happens, it can be difficult for the INFJ to control their emotions and they may lash out in ways that are uncharacteristic of their usual behavior.
Tips For Communicating With An Angry INFJ
If you find yourself in a situation where an INFJ is angry with you, it’s important to approach the situation with empathy and understanding. Here are some tips for communicating with an angry INFJ:
1. Listen actively: When an INFJ is angry, they may need to vent their emotions and thoughts. It’s important to listen actively and show that you understand their perspective. Avoid interrupting or dismissing their feelings.
2. Acknowledge their emotions: INFJs may feel like their anger is not being taken seriously or understood. Acknowledge their emotions and validate their feelings, even if you don’t agree with them.
3. Be patient: INFJs may take time to process their emotions and decide whether to address the situation or not. Be patient and allow them the space they need to reflect on the situation.
4. Apologize and change your behavior: If you have done something to upset an INFJ, apologize sincerely and make an effort to change your behavior in the future. INFJs appreciate honesty and authenticity.
5. Avoid arguing: INFJs are logical feelers, which means they process situations before getting angry. If an INFJ is angry, they have likely already processed the situation and justified their anger. Arguing with them will only escalate the situation.
6. Prioritize what you need to express: If you need to express something to an angry INFJ, prioritize what you need to say and stick to it. Avoid unloading all your thoughts and emotions at once, as this can overwhelm an INFJ.
Understanding And Supporting The INFJ Personality Type
Understanding and supporting the INFJ personality type can be challenging, but it is essential to maintain a healthy relationship with them. INFJs have a deep sense of empathy and are highly attuned to the emotions and needs of others. They are also strategic problem solvers and advisers, which means they often take on the role of caretakers and peacemakers in their relationships.
To support an INFJ, it is crucial to respect their need for privacy and downtime. They may become overwhelmed by bright lights, strong smells, loud noises, or large groups of people, which can drain their energy. Give them space to recharge their batteries and avoid pressuring them to socialize when they are not up for it.
INFJs also need validation and understanding from their loved ones. They often feel misunderstood by society, which can lead to feelings of isolation and low self-esteem. Listen to their thoughts and feelings without judgment and offer them emotional support when they need it.
It is also important to recognize that INFJs may struggle with confrontation and conflict resolution. They may need time to reflect on a problem before addressing it, and they may prefer to release their anger through creative outlets or exercise rather than confrontational conversations. Be patient and understanding when discussing sensitive topics with an INFJ, and avoid aggressive or confrontational behavior.
In summary, understanding and supporting an INFJ requires empathy, patience, and respect for their unique needs and personality traits. By offering emotional support, respecting their boundaries, and avoiding conflict, you can maintain a healthy relationship with an INFJ while also helping them thrive in their personal and professional lives.