Are you friends with an INFJ and suspect that they might be upset with you?
INFJs are known for being empathetic and compassionate individuals, but when they’re angry, they can be difficult to read. They tend to withdraw and shut down, making it hard to tell if they’re mad at you or just lost in their thoughts.
In this article, we’ll explore the signs that an INFJ is angry with you and what you can do to make things right. So, if you want to learn how to navigate the complex emotions of an INFJ, keep reading!
How To Tell If An INFJ Is Mad At You
INFJs are introverted and intuitive individuals who process their emotions internally. This means that when they’re upset, they may not express it outwardly, making it difficult to tell if they’re mad at you or just going through a tough time.
Here are some signs that an INFJ is angry with you:
1. Withdrawal: INFJs tend to withdraw and become more introspective when they’re upset. They may avoid social situations or isolate themselves from others.
2. Silence: INFJs may stop talking or become unresponsive when they’re angry. They may need time to sort through their thoughts and emotions before they’re ready to talk about what’s bothering them.
3. Passive-aggressive behavior: Some INFJs may exhibit passive-aggressive behavior when they’re upset. They may make snide comments or give you the “silent treatment.”
4. Coldness: INFJs may become cold and distant when they’re angry. They may seem unemotional or robotic, which is a stark contrast to their usual warm and empathetic nature.
5. Door slam: If an INFJ has reached their breaking point, they may cut you out of their life permanently. This is known as the “INFJ door slam,” and it’s a sign that they’ve had enough and can no longer tolerate the situation.
The Complex Emotions Of An INFJ
INFJs have complex emotions that can be difficult to understand. When they’re upset, they may experience a range of emotions such as anger, sadness, and frustration. However, they often try to process their thoughts and feelings internally before expressing them outwardly.
One of the reasons INFJs withdraw when they’re angry is that they need time to sort through their emotions. They may feel overwhelmed by the intensity of their feelings and need to take a step back to gain some perspective. During this time, they may shut off noise, lights, or find a room where they can be alone to deal with their thoughts and charged emotions.
Some INFJs may also exhibit passive-aggressive behavior when they’re upset. This behavior can manifest in snide comments or giving the “silent treatment.” However, it’s important to note that this behavior is not always meant as a passive-aggressive instinct. It’s an INFJ’s way of sorting out the information through intuition and thinking without getting overwhelmed by the emotions of everyone else.
INFJs may also become cold and distant when they’re angry. This is because they want to protect themselves from being hurt again. They may put on a brave face and pretend that nothing is wrong because they don’t trust their own feelings without having the time to analyze them.
The INFJ door slam is another complex emotion that INFJs experience when they’ve reached their breaking point. This behavior is usually the result of months or years of someone hurting the INFJ and their trying to mend the relationship to the point where they become drained and exhausted. INFJs tend to be there for other people, caring about their feelings, forgiving their shortcomings, being a shoulder to cry on, and giving of themselves. But when someone takes advantage of their giving nature too often or badgers them into doing things they don’t want to do, INFJs will resort to the door slam. This behavior is a sign that they’ve had enough and can no longer tolerate the situation.
Signs That An INFJ Is Mad At You
If you’re unsure whether an INFJ is mad at you, here are some specific signs to look out for:
1. Avoidance: If an INFJ is avoiding you or cancelling plans with you, it could be a sign that they’re upset with you. They may not want to confront you directly, but they also don’t want to spend time with you.
2. Sarcasm: When an INFJ is angry, they may use biting sarcasm as a way to express their frustration. If they’re making sarcastic comments directed towards you, it could be a sign that they’re mad.
3. Lack of emotion: INFJs may become emotionally distant when they’re upset. If they’re usually warm and empathetic towards you, but suddenly seem cold and unemotional, it could be a sign that something is wrong.
4. Criticism: When an INFJ is angry, they may become more critical than usual. They may nitpick at things you do or say, or point out flaws in your behavior.
5. Blunt communication: INFJs are usually very tactful and diplomatic in their communication style. However, when they’re angry, they may become more blunt and direct in their communication with you.
6. Physical signs of tension: INFJs may exhibit physical signs of tension when they’re upset, such as clenching their jaw or fists, or avoiding eye contact.
Remember that every INFJ is different, and these signs may not apply to everyone. If you’re unsure whether an INFJ is upset with you, the best thing to do is to ask them directly and give them the space to process their emotions in their own way.
How To Approach An INFJ When They’re Angry
Approaching an INFJ when they’re angry can be a delicate situation. Here are some tips on how to handle it:
1. Give them space: INFJs need time alone to process their emotions, so give them space to do so. Don’t try to force them to talk or make them feel guilty for needing time alone.
2. Listen without judgment: When they’re ready to talk, listen to them without judgment. Let them express their thoughts and feelings without interrupting or trying to defend yourself.
3. Apologize and take responsibility: If you’ve done something wrong, apologize and take responsibility for your actions. INFJs appreciate honesty and humility.
4. Avoid confrontation: INFJs dislike confrontation, so avoid being confrontational or aggressive in your approach. Speak calmly and respectfully.
5. Be patient: INFJs may take longer than others to process their emotions and come to a resolution. Be patient with them and don’t rush the process.
Tips For Making Things Right With An INFJ
If you suspect that an INFJ is upset with you, here are some tips to help make things right:
1. Give them space: INFJs need time to process their emotions and thoughts before they’re ready to talk about what’s bothering them. Respect their need for space and avoid pressuring them to talk before they’re ready.
2. Listen actively: When an INFJ is ready to talk, listen actively and without judgment. They may have a lot to say, so give them the time and space to express themselves fully.
3. Validate their feelings: INFJs are sensitive individuals who may feel misunderstood or invalidated when they’re upset. Let them know that you understand how they’re feeling and that you’re sorry for any hurt you may have caused.
4. Be sincere: INFJs value authenticity and sincerity in their relationships. If you apologize, make sure it’s genuine and not just an attempt to smooth things over.
5. Show them kindness: INFJs crave harmony and mutual support in their relationships. Show them kindness and empathy, and avoid taking advantage of their giving nature.
Remember that INFJs are complex individuals who may process their emotions differently than others. By respecting their need for space, listening actively, validating their feelings, being sincere, and showing kindness, you can work towards making things right with an INFJ when they’re upset with you.
Understanding And Navigating INFJ Relationships
INFJs are sensitive and empathetic individuals who value harmony in their relationships. They tend to attract toxic, narcissistic, or emotionally needy people because they want to help them, but this can lead to them being taken for granted. To avoid triggering an INFJ’s anger, it’s important to understand their communication style and emotional needs.
INFJs have a difficult time discussing conflict and may keep negative feelings to themselves to avoid tense conversations. It’s important to create a safe and non-judgmental space for them to express their emotions. They may also have trouble accepting feedback, viewing it as overly critical. It’s important to deliver feedback in a loving and constructive way.
When an INFJ is upset, they may withdraw and become more introspective. It’s important to give them space and time to process their emotions. They may also exhibit passive-aggressive behavior or become cold and distant. It’s important to communicate openly and honestly with them, while also respecting their need for alone time.
If an INFJ has reached their breaking point, they may cut you out of their life permanently. This is known as the “INFJ door slam,” and it’s a sign that they’ve had enough and can no longer tolerate the situation. To avoid this, it’s important to listen to their needs and respect their boundaries.
In conclusion, understanding and navigating INFJ relationships requires patience, empathy, and effective communication. By creating a safe and supportive environment for them to express their emotions, respecting their need for alone time, and listening to their needs and boundaries, you can maintain a healthy and harmonious relationship with an INFJ.