Do you ever find it difficult to connect with certain people?
Maybe you struggle to find common ground or feel like you’re not being heard.
If you’re trying to communicate with an INFP, it can be especially challenging.
INFPs are known for their rich inner world and deep empathy, but they can also be reserved and hard to read.
In this article, we’ll explore some tips and tricks for talking to an INFP in a way that will help you build a meaningful connection.
Whether you’re looking to make a new friend or strengthen an existing relationship, these strategies will help you navigate the unique communication style of an INFP.
So let’s dive in and learn how to talk to INFPs!
How To Talk To INFP
1. Show Genuine Interest
INFPs are curious about other people and love to listen. They are often on the receiving end of others’ emotional unloading, so it’s important to show them that you care by being genuinely interested in what they have to say. Ask them questions about their day, their thoughts on current events, or what they’re passionate about. INFPs will usually be happy to talk your ear off if you show a genuine interest in hearing what they have to say!
2. Find Common Interests
INFPs have a rich inner world, but they don’t always show it to the outer world. Find their interests and talk about them. They may enjoy art, movies (especially fantasy), TV shows, books, music, unique experiences, traveling, searching for meaning, philosophizing about life, and psychology. They appreciate uncommon things and deep conversations. Avoid talking about common things like the weather or unimportant topics.
3. Be Warm, Open, and Gentle
INFPs are sensitive and emotional individuals who appreciate warmth and gentleness in communication. Show that you’re interested in them and their interests. Be open-minded and non-judgmental when discussing different topics. Avoid asking difficult questions about work or family unless they bring it up themselves.
4. Choose the Right Time and Place
INFPs are easily distracted by noise and too many people around them. Choose a quieter place where you and your listener are comfortable and it will be easier to speak and listen. Wait for or create the right moment of focus so you can get the person’s undivided attention.
5. Respect Their Boundaries
INFPs can come across as distant and reserved at times because they need time to reflect on their views of the world and people. Respect their boundaries and don’t push them to open up if they’re not ready. They tend to have a wide circle of acquaintances but a limited inner circle of close friends.
Understanding INFPs: Traits And Characteristics
INFPs are one of the sixteen personality types created by Katharine Briggs and Isabel Myers, based on the work of psychologist C.G. Jung. The INFP code stands for Introversion, iNtuition, Feeling, and Perceiving, which are four core personality traits that define this type. INFPs are energized by time alone (Introverted), focus on ideas and concepts rather than facts and details (iNtuitive), make decisions based on feelings and values (Feeling), and prefer to be spontaneous and flexible rather than planned and organized (Perceiving).
INFPs have a rich inner world that is often misunderstood by others. They think about everything and then think about everything again, reliving it all in their dreams. They are deeply observant and sensitive to the world around them but also get so caught up in the moment that they temporarily forget the existence of time. They are willing to talk about everything until the sun comes up but forget to check the time of the last train home.
INFPs commonly assume the role of wanderer or seeker because they crave new ideas, connections, and possibilities. They seek to understand the world (and themselves) through the lens of ideas. They enjoy traveling because it feels rife with possibilities, such as a serendipitous encounter with a kindred spirit, the discovery of a life-changing book, or finding inspiration through ancient art and architecture.
INFPs can come across as distant and reserved at times because they need time to reflect on their views of the world and people. They tend to have a wide circle of acquaintances but a limited inner circle of close friends. They appreciate warmth and gentleness in communication and are sensitive to criticism or harsh words. When talking to an INFP, it’s important to be aware of their unique needs and respect their boundaries.
Why Communication With INFPs Can Be Challenging
While INFPs are great listeners and empathetic individuals, communication with them can be challenging for some people. One reason is that INFPs tend to avoid small talk and surface-level subjects. They prefer deeper, more meaningful conversations that explore ideas and emotions. This can be intimidating for people who are not used to discussing such topics.
Another reason communication with INFPs can be challenging is that they are sensitive and easily overwhelmed by noise and too many people around them. They need a quiet, comfortable space where they can focus on the conversation. If the environment is too chaotic or distracting, they may shut down or withdraw.
INFPs also have a strong sense of justice and morality, which can make it difficult to communicate with them if your values and beliefs differ significantly from theirs. They may become defensive or argumentative if they feel their values are being challenged or dismissed.
Finally, INFPs tend to have a limited inner circle of close friends and confidants. They value deep, meaningful connections and may be hesitant to open up to people they don’t know well. This can make it difficult to establish a rapport with them if you’re not already part of their inner circle.
Tips For Effective Communication With INFPs
Effective communication with INFPs requires a few key tips to keep in mind. Here are some helpful suggestions to keep in mind when communicating with an INFP:
1. Be Conscientious and Honest
INFPs can easily spot dishonesty, and they are very sensitive to criticism or harsh words. Give them time to think through what you’re saying and consider the future implications of your ideas. To gain an INFP’s trust, you must be sincere in what you say. To persuade an INFP, focus on how your message will benefit others or how your message provides creative opportunities.
2. Don’t Dismiss Their Feelings or Values
INFPs hold their feelings and values close to their hearts, and dismissing them could cause irreparable harm to your relationship. Avoid talking over them or thinking of responses while they’re talking. Truly listen to what they have to say. INFPs are some of the very best listeners, and they rarely find people who listen as well as they do. If you can truly listen to them, you will have a much better chance of being trusted.
3. Be Calm and Respectful
INFPs appreciate calm and respectful communication. Be patient, or appear as such, if they don’t understand initially. Let’s discuss – not compete. Provide feedback gently.
4. Use “Big Picture” Thinking
INFPs like to start with the big picture and progress to details. Explain difficult-to-grasp concepts using analogies. Allow them the freedom to set goals and complete tasks independently. Pay attention when they are speaking to you, and learn to listen intently.
5. Be Open to Their Ideas
INFPs value different possibilities and want others to be open to their ideas as well. Don’t judge an idea right off as not feasible. Allow them to come back and reopen a conversation after they have thought about it some more.
By keeping these tips in mind, you can effectively communicate with an INFP and build a strong relationship based on mutual respect and understanding.
Active Listening: The Key To Connecting With An INFP
Active listening is an essential skill when it comes to connecting with an INFP. Because they are natural listeners, they also appreciate it when others listen actively to them. Here are some tips on how to actively listen to an INFP:
1. Give them your undivided attention
INFPs appreciate it when people give them their full attention. When you’re talking to an INFP, make sure you’re fully present and not distracted by other things. Avoid checking your phone or looking around the room. Instead, maintain eye contact and focus on what they’re saying.
2. Show empathy
INFPs are highly empathetic individuals who value emotional connection. When they share their thoughts and feelings, try to put yourself in their shoes and understand their perspective. Reflect back on what they said and show that you understand how they feel.
3. Ask open-ended questions
INFPs love deep conversations and exploring different ideas. Ask open-ended questions that encourage them to share more about themselves and their thoughts. Avoid asking yes or no questions that can lead to a dead end in the conversation.
4. Validate their feelings
INFPs are sensitive individuals who can be easily affected by the opinions of others. When they share their thoughts and feelings, validate their emotions by acknowledging how they feel. Avoid dismissing or minimizing their feelings, as this can cause them to shut down.
5. Avoid interrupting
INFPs tend to think deeply about the topics they discuss, and interruptions can disrupt their thought process. Avoid interrupting them when they’re speaking, even if you have something important to add. Instead, wait for them to finish speaking before adding your thoughts.
By actively listening to an INFP, you can build a deeper connection with them and create a more meaningful conversation. Remember that INFPs value authenticity and emotional connection in communication, so be yourself and show genuine interest in what they have to say.
Empathy And Understanding: Building A Meaningful Connection
INFPs are known for their empathetic and understanding nature. They are drawn to deep, meaningful connections in their relationships and seek to understand the people they care about on a profound level. To build a meaningful connection with an INFP, it’s important to show empathy and understanding towards them as well.
One way to do this is by actively listening to them without judgment or interruption. INFPs appreciate being heard and understood, so it’s important to give them the space to express themselves fully. Try to put yourself in their shoes and see things from their perspective. This can help you connect with them on a deeper level and build trust.
Another way to show empathy towards an INFP is by being aware of their emotional needs. They are sensitive individuals who value warmth and gentleness in communication. Be mindful of your tone and body language when talking to them, and try to create a safe and comfortable environment for them to express themselves.
It’s also important to respect their boundaries and give them the space they need. INFPs tend to have a wide circle of acquaintances but a limited inner circle of close friends. They may take some time to open up, so don’t push them too hard or too fast.
Finally, finding common interests can help build a meaningful connection with an INFP. They appreciate uncommon things and deep conversations, so try to find topics that interest both of you. This can help create a shared sense of purpose and understanding.
Common Communication Pitfalls To Avoid With INFPs
While communicating with INFPs, there are some common pitfalls that you should avoid to ensure effective communication. Here are some of them:
1. Avoid Small Talk and Surface-Level Conversations
INFPs value deep and meaningful conversations, so avoid small talk or surface-level topics. They may lose interest quickly if the conversation does not delve into something more thought-provoking or inspiring.
2. Don’t Criticize or Judge Them Harshly
INFPs are very sensitive to criticism and may take it personally. Avoid harsh criticism or judgment, as it can damage the relationship and make them withdraw from social interactions.
3. Don’t Rush Them Into Making Decisions
INFPs take time to reflect and analyze before making decisions. Don’t rush them into making a decision or push them into something they’re not ready for. Give them time to process their thoughts and feelings before asking for a response.
4. Don’t Interrupt or Talk Over Them
INFPs are good listeners and appreciate being heard. Avoid interrupting or talking over them, as it can be frustrating for them and may cause them to shut down.
5. Don’t Be Too Aggressive or Assertive
INFPs are gentle and empathetic individuals who appreciate warmth and kindness in communication. Avoid being too aggressive or assertive, as it can make them feel uncomfortable and may cause them to withdraw from the conversation.
By avoiding these common communication pitfalls, you can have a more productive and meaningful conversation with INFPs. Remember to be patient, kind, and respectful of their boundaries, and you’ll be sure to have a great conversation!
