If you’re an INFJ, you know that life can be tough.
You often feel like you don’t fit in with the rest of the world, and it’s easy to feel alone and misunderstood.
But what hurts an INFJ the most? Rejection.
Whether it’s a lack of understanding from others or feeling like you don’t belong, rejection can cut deep for this personality type.
In this article, we’ll explore the unique struggles of the INFJ and offer some tips for how to cope with rejection and heal from emotional pain.
So if you’re an INFJ looking for some insight and support, keep reading.
What Hurts INFJ The Most
For INFJs, rejection can come in many forms. It can be as simple as feeling like you don’t fit in with a group or as painful as someone breaking your trust and showing little care for your feelings.
As an INFJ, you may feel like you’re constantly observing the world around you and trying to understand the motivations of others. But when it comes to understanding you, others may fall short.
This lack of understanding can lead to feelings of loneliness, rejection, and even self-doubt. You may wonder if there’s something wrong with you or why you can’t seem to connect with others in the same way they connect with each other.
It’s important to remember that being an INFJ is a unique and valuable trait. Your sensitivity and intuition allow you to see the world in a way that others cannot. But it’s also important to acknowledge that rejection hurts, and it’s okay to feel that pain.
The Unique Struggles Of The INFJ Personality Type
INFJs face a variety of struggles that are unique to their personality type. One of the biggest challenges is feeling like they don’t fit in with the groups around them. INFJs are highly observant and can quickly understand the motivations of others, but this understanding is often not reciprocated. This can lead to feelings of isolation and rejection.
Another struggle for INFJs is their tendency to internalize stress and shut others out. While they may appear cold or distant, this is simply their way of recharging during alone time. However, this can be misinterpreted by others and lead to further feelings of rejection.
INFJs also have a perfectionist streak and can be stubborn when stressed. This can cause them to lash out or become overwhelmed, leading to further feelings of inadequacy.
Perhaps the most challenging struggle for INFJs is feeling misunderstood, even by themselves. They are complex individuals with a rich inner world, but this complexity can be confusing and overwhelming at times. It’s important for INFJs to take the time to understand themselves and their unique traits, as well as finding supportive individuals who appreciate and value them for who they are.
Why Rejection Hurts INFJs So Much
Rejection can be especially difficult for INFJs because they tend to invest a lot of themselves in their relationships. When an INFJ finds someone they click with, they often rearrange their lives to make room for that person. They may even start to consider the other person’s needs, wants, and desires as equally or more important than their own.
This level of investment can lead to a deep sense of attachment and reliance on the relationship. When that relationship ends, it can feel like a huge loss and leave a gaping hole inside the INFJ.
Additionally, INFJs tend to have fewer close relationships than other personality types. Losing one of those few close relationships can feel like being cut loose from an anchor. This sense of loss can trigger a form of withdrawal in the brain’s reward system, similar to what happens with addiction.
Furthermore, INFJs are often sensitive and emotional individuals, making them more susceptible to feeling hurt by rejection. The INFJ door slam is a prime example of how rejection can affect an INFJ. When pushed too far, an INFJ may cut someone out of their life permanently as a way to protect themselves from further emotional pain.
Coping Strategies For Dealing With Rejection
Dealing with rejection can be especially challenging for INFJs who tend to feel things deeply. However, there are strategies that can help you cope with rejection in a healthy way.
1. Acknowledge and process your feelings: Rejection can be painful, and it’s important to allow yourself to feel the emotions that come with it. Don’t try to suppress or deny your feelings. Instead, take the time to acknowledge and process them. You can do this by journaling, talking to a trusted friend or therapist, or engaging in activities that bring you comfort.
2. Don’t blame yourself: It’s natural to want to understand why you were rejected, but it’s important not to blame yourself. Remember that rejection is often about the other person’s preferences or circumstances and not necessarily a reflection of your worth as a person.
3. Focus on your strengths: Rejection can make you doubt yourself and your abilities. But it’s important to remember your strengths and accomplishments. Focus on what you’re good at and what makes you unique as an INFJ.
4. Practice self-care: Taking care of yourself is crucial when dealing with rejection. Make sure to prioritize self-care activities like exercise, healthy eating, getting enough sleep, and engaging in activities that bring you joy.
5. Keep putting yourself out there: It can be tempting to avoid situations where you might face rejection, but it’s important to keep putting yourself out there. Whether it’s applying for a new job or trying a new hobby, taking risks can lead to new opportunities and experiences.
Remember that rejection is a normal part of life, and everyone experiences it at some point. By acknowledging your feelings, focusing on your strengths, practicing self-care, and taking risks, you can learn to cope with rejection in a healthy way as an INFJ.
Healing From Emotional Pain: Tips For INFJs
If you’re an INFJ struggling with emotional pain, there are several things you can do to help yourself heal.
First, it’s important to recognize that suppressing your negative emotions can be harmful in the long run. Instead, try to accept and express your emotions in a healthy way. This might involve writing in a journal, talking to a trusted friend, or finding a creative outlet for your feelings.
As an INFJ, you may also benefit from focusing on developing your Judging functions, Extraverted Feeling and Introverted Thinking. This can help you become more self-aware and improve your communication and interpersonal relationships. It can also help you set healthy boundaries that consider your own needs.
Additionally, many INFJs find comfort in spirituality or religion. Whether it’s through prayer, meditation, or simply finding hope in a higher power or ideal, looking to something greater than yourself can be incredibly helpful when dealing with emotional pain.
Finally, remember that as an INFJ, you have a natural inclination towards helping others. While it’s important to take care of yourself first, reaching out to others who may be going through similar struggles can be a source of healing for both of you. And as you build relationships based on mutual understanding and empathy, you may find that the pain of rejection begins to fade away.
Finding Support And Connection As An INFJ
As an INFJ, finding support and connection can be challenging, but it’s not impossible. It’s important to surround yourself with people who understand and appreciate your unique qualities. Seek out individuals who share similar values and interests, and who are willing to listen and support you.
Joining groups or communities that align with your values and interests can also be helpful. This can provide a sense of belonging and connection with others who share your passions. Whether it’s a book club, a volunteer organization, or a spiritual community, finding a group that resonates with you can help you feel less alone.
It’s also important to communicate your needs and boundaries with those around you. As an INFJ, you may have a tendency to put others’ needs before your own, which can lead to feeling drained and unfulfilled. Learning how to set healthy boundaries and prioritize self-care can help you feel more empowered and in control of your relationships.
Finally, consider seeking therapy or counseling to work through any emotional pain or trauma related to rejection or past relationships. A trained therapist can help you process your feelings, develop coping strategies, and work towards building healthier relationships in the future.
Remember, as an INFJ, you have unique strengths and qualities that are valuable and worthy of appreciation. By finding supportive connections and prioritizing self-care, you can overcome the pain of rejection and build meaningful relationships with others.
