Have you ever wondered what goes on in the mind of an INFJ when they’re angry?
INFJs, also known as “The Counselor” type, are known for their empathetic and compassionate nature. However, when pushed to their limits, their anger can be intense and explosive.
In this article, we’ll explore what happens when an INFJ gets mad, how they cope with their emotions, and what you can do to set things right.
So buckle up and get ready to dive into the complex world of INFJ rage.
What Happens When An INFJ Gets Mad
When an INFJ gets mad, they often withdraw and become more introspective. They may seek out a quiet space where they can process their thoughts and emotions without being overwhelmed by the feelings of others. This behavior can sometimes be mistaken for passive-aggressiveness or the “silent treatment,” but it’s actually a way for INFJs to sort through their emotions and intuition.
If an INFJ isn’t given the opportunity to process their anger, they may end up exploding or regretting their actions later on. They may also put on a brave face and pretend that everything is okay, even if they’re struggling internally.
Dealing with conflict can be particularly challenging for INFJs, as they can get their own emotions mixed up with those of others and lose sight of the facts. In times of stress, INFJs may become more critical and harsh than usual, tearing down relationships and plans in a state of self-destructive fury.
The INFJ’s Calm Before The Storm
Before an INFJ reaches their breaking point, they often exhibit a calm and level-headed demeanor. They may try to rationalize their thoughts and feelings, carefully choosing how they should react and who they should share their emotions with. This can make it difficult for others to detect when an INFJ is upset or angry.
However, as the pressure builds up inside, the INFJ’s emotions can become like a ticking time bomb. They may start to withdraw from social situations, become more introspective, and seek out solitude. During this time, they are likely processing their thoughts and emotions, trying to make sense of the situation before they react.
If someone tries to approach an INFJ during this period, they may not respond or may respond with short, curt answers. This is not meant to be rude or dismissive, but rather a way for the INFJ to protect themselves and maintain control over their emotions.
As the tension builds up inside the INFJ, they may start to exhibit physical symptoms such as restlessness, fidgeting, or clenching their jaw. These are signs that the INFJ is struggling to keep their emotions in check and that their calm façade is starting to crack.
Eventually, if the pressure becomes too much, the INFJ may reach a breaking point and explode in a burst of anger. This can take the form of physical outbursts such as violence or yelling, or more psychological reactions such as abruptly cutting someone off.
In order to prevent an INFJ from reaching this point, it’s important to give them space and time to process their thoughts and emotions. Trying to force them to talk or pushing them too hard can make things worse. Instead, it’s best to approach them calmly and respectfully, giving them the opportunity to share their feelings in their own time and on their own terms.
The Triggers That Set Off An INFJ’s Anger
There are a few key triggers that can set off an INFJ’s anger. The first is feeling like their values or beliefs are being threatened or disrespected. INFJs hold their values and ideals very close to their hearts, and any perceived attack on them can be deeply upsetting.
Another trigger is feeling like they’re not being heard or understood. INFJs often feel like they don’t fit in with the rest of the world and can struggle to find people who truly understand them. When they feel like their thoughts and feelings are being dismissed or ignored, it can lead to frustration and anger.
INFJs also have a strong sense of empathy, which can be both a blessing and a curse. They can feel the emotions of others very deeply, which can be overwhelming at times. If they perceive someone as intentionally causing harm or pain to others, it can trigger a strong emotional response in the INFJ.
Finally, INFJs can become angry when they feel like they’re being taken advantage of or mistreated. They have a deep desire to care for others and maintain harmony in their relationships, but this can sometimes lead to them being taken for granted or treated poorly. When this happens, INFJs may become resentful and angry.
The Intensity Of An INFJ’s Anger
When an INFJ experiences anger, it can be more focused, intense, and extreme than other types. This is because their dominant function, Introverted Intuition (Ni), is closely linked to their emotions and intuition. In times of stress, their less-developed function, Extroverted Sensing (Se), takes over and can cause them to become obsessive and defensive.
INFJs may also experience a “grip experience” where their inferior function takes over completely. During this state, they may have an obsessive focus on external data, overindulge in sensual pleasure, and have an adversarial attitude toward the outer world. This altered state can lead to a lessening of social controls and more frequent expressions of anger.
The anger directed at either things or people may be more focused, intense, and extreme than with other inferior functions. This means that when an INFJ is angry, they may lash out in a way that surprises those who think of them as harmless. However, it’s important to note that INFJs are forgiving and empathetic by nature. If someone apologizes and changes their behavior, they are likely to forgive and move on from the situation.
Coping Mechanisms For An Angry INFJ
Here are some coping mechanisms that an INFJ can use when they’re feeling angry:
1. Take a step back: When an INFJ is feeling angry, it’s important for them to take a step back from the situation and give themselves some space. They can find a quiet space where they can be alone and process their thoughts and emotions.
2. Engage in creative hobbies: INFJs often release their anger through art, creative hobbies, or exercise. Engaging in activities that they enjoy can help them channel their emotions in a healthy way.
3. Practice meditation: INFJs are perfectionists and can become easily bogged down by small details. Practicing meditation can help them develop better focus and stay tuned with the present moment. This can help ease frustration and annoyance related to mundane details.
4. Communicate assertively: While INFJs may avoid conflict, it’s important for them to communicate assertively when they’re feeling angry. They can express their feelings in a calm and respectful manner, while also standing up for themselves and their values.
5. Seek support: INFJs may benefit from seeking support from trusted friends or family members when they’re feeling angry. Talking to someone who understands them and can offer empathy can be helpful in processing their emotions.
By using these coping mechanisms, an INFJ can manage their anger in a healthy way and maintain their social harmony while also taking care of themselves.
How To Resolve Conflicts With An INFJ
If you find yourself in conflict with an INFJ, it’s important to approach the situation with patience and understanding. Here are some tips to help you resolve conflicts with an INFJ in a healthy way:
1. Give them space: When an INFJ is upset, they may need time alone to process their emotions. Respect their need for space and avoid pressuring them to talk before they’re ready.
2. Listen actively: When they’re ready to talk, listen actively and without judgment. Let them express their thoughts and feelings fully before responding.
3. Be clear and concise: INFJs appreciate clear communication and may become overwhelmed by too much information or too many details. Keep your communication simple and to the point.
4. Focus on solutions: INFJs are problem-solvers at heart, so focus on finding solutions rather than dwelling on the problem itself.
5. Show empathy: INFJs are highly empathetic and respond well to others who show empathy towards them. Try to see things from their perspective and show that you understand where they’re coming from.
6. Follow through on commitments: INFJs value honesty and integrity, so it’s important to follow through on your commitments and promises.
By following these tips, you can help resolve conflicts with an INFJ in a way that respects their need for space and understanding while also finding a solution that works for everyone involved.
